What the hell happened

I was just reading Susan Hayden’s blog and had to agree with everything she said, I mean dad’s aren’t supposed to die? They’re invincible, strong, brave and everything, right? Well apparently not, they’re human like the rest of us, now that’s a come-down if ever I saw one. Perhaps that’s why it’s so difficult to accept, like accepting the fact that a mother can die and leave behind young children. How does one grow up without a mother?

Fortunately I never had to do that one, and in actual fact I can’t complain, I had my mother and father in my life until the good old age of 49, which will go down in history as a pretty crappy year. Apart from the good things that happened, like seeing my parents as much as I could, having a great 90th birthday party for my dad, seeing my son off to the States and having great holidays, doing a lot of climbing…..Yes, I’ve read the book, I’m being grateful.

And I’m enforcing my personal motto – I refuse to say the words: “I feel guilty”, I’m not even going to go into the whys and wherefores of this statement. Don’t do it! Do you know how many women I speak to who tell me “I feel guilty’, at some point in the conversation. I stop them and make them take it back, well tactfully of course. Why do we feel guilty about things that happen to our children and our spouses and about things that don’t happen to them. Just stop, we’re all doing what we can and sometimes we hash it up and sometimes we don’t, and for the rest we do our best, and we should feel proud of it. So there.

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Posted by on March 3, 2017 in Uncategorized


Potato, Potahto

Since the blogs posted on will be scrapped soon, I’m saving them here…


Due to the nature of my home language, I often find myself in a tight spot where Dutch is concerned.

Afrikaans evolved because the Dutch landed on the southernmost tip of Africa in 1652. Since then, the language has changed (with Malaysian, Khoi San, French and English influences) and has been simplified.

Some people like to think it’s ‘baby language’, I promote it as Esperanto. Better than Esperanto in fact, because it’s a language that already exists with a rich, thriving culture.

When we arrived in Belgium, we had an immediate advantage because we could understand about 90% of everything.

Grammar presented a problem, so I went for Dutch lessons. And I thought I was doing well, until one day at my children’s school, one of the moms said “I think I’m beginning to understand Afrikaans” when I thought I was putting my best Dutch foot forward.

I stumbled on nonetheless. Trying to master the rest of the vocabulary, I kept using words that don’t exist in Dutch. I quickly tried to right these wrongs as I could see a blank or horrified expression creeping into people’s faces.

I learnt not to use ‘naweek’ but ‘weekend’, and quickly had to stamp out the word ‘baie’ which means ‘a lot’, ‘very’ etc, a very versatile word!

I wonder how many people chuckled for hours as I stumbled about, severely maiming their language.

Here, my children learn words and songs in Afrikaans as a part of Dutch dialect studies. One day someone started singing an old folk song at me when they heard I was from South Africa. Mostly they find some of our words hilarious, and the grammar and spelling ‘wrong’!

The dilemma was the words with a different meaning in Dutch, like ‘almost’, which means the complete opposite. When I say, ”I almost had enough money”, it means exactly that in Afrikaans. But in Dutch, it means that you had ‘just enough’. When this phrase is used in the negative, I just give up.

Mostly when you learn a new language the damage you can do is limited, but if you already have some words at your disposal that mostly work, you put your foot in your mouth quite often.

I, for instance, saw someone’s eyes pop out when my husband said that “it was a lovely water play area for the kids to splash around in”. What he had actually said was that they could urinate there!

Last week our kids howled with laughter in the back of the car when my husband thought he politely told someone they were very kind and thanks for their help. According to them he’d told some old lady she was “very cool”.

Often I gulp as a severe swear word in my language just rolls over someone’s lips without anyone blinking. I quickly learnt to neutralize my expression as a stud farm was transformed into a ‘fokkerij’ and other things into other unmentionable words I still can’t use.

When my kids come home with something weird I don’t immediately freak out and demand “Where did you hear that?”, as my daughter once nonchalantly answered “My teacher”.

I quickly learnt not to trust dubbing on TV, as my son was horrified when I jokingly called him what I thought was an ‘idiot’ but turns out it was something well below the belt.

All I can say about my Flemish is that I understand fluently. People mostly understand me fluently, if I remember to articulate properly, conjugate verbs, avoid words I’m not sure of and smile broadly just in case…

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Posted by on January 13, 2017 in Uncategorized


Upholstery course

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Posted by on June 12, 2016 in Uncategorized


First world meets Third…

We stepped out of Beijing’s airport into a three-hour ride that inexplicably took six hours. In Tangshan people stared at us as we pushed the foreigner count up to nine. We stared back at people cycling, riding motorbikes and mopeds and general hooting and organized chaos. We studied the street stalls selling all kinds of things and stepped into the serene calm cleanliness of a first world shopping centre with first world prices.

People played cards in the park, or danced or chatted and engaged with us. We watched a hazy sunset from the temple on the hill.

Other than that I took photos of street names in case I got lost and couldn’t remember the names or couldn’t pronounce them.

Back in Beijing, pollution hung thick as pea-soup and smellier. It eventually started to lift when the wind picked up.beijing (1 of 1)

beijing (1 of 1)-7

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beijing (1 of 1)-96

iso1600,f5.6,1-80s (1 of 1)

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Posted by on November 10, 2014 in Uncategorized


Fun and laughter, and food of course…..

I was spoilt these holidays, or let’s call it making up for lost time.

The first hike happened as an ad hoc opportunity not to be wasted, none other than the Fish River Canyon in Namibia, the second in the Dolomiti in Northern Italy.

The only similarity between the two, was the presence of rocks, in all shapes and sizes, boulders, shale, stones, great big hurdles or denying obstacles in some cases. A firm reminder of what happens when those things come crashing down.

For the first time in my life, I’ve enjoyed a joint shopping experience, at a sports store, and nowhere else, because of course, kit has to be had! The new mini towels just piqued my curiosity and I had to have one. Strangely, they don’t feel like they’re drying but you do sort of feel dry afterwards, so it works, but not like a huge fluffy super absorbent specimen you’d have at home. And much like Ford Prefect in The Hitchhiker’s guide to the Galaxy, I rather wondered it it would be good to suck on when the nutrients got rather low.

The Fish River Hike is entirely self-sufficient, except that you can drink the water, and swim in mid-winter. The Sulphur hot Springs were most amazing, like having a swim in paradise. After the first two days, we didn’t see a living soul, except some baboons and horses, until we reached AiAis and cold beers, chairs and real beds.

blommepad (1 of 1)Namibia

In contrast, the Dolomiti we tackled in mid-summer, it snowed! No matter, the refugios cater for everything, even Italian monopoly and so we whiled away our morning. Rocks were copious but also catered for fun, in the form of via ferratas, a kind of cable system where you hook up so you don’t fall if you day dream. There was too much food to eat, and a plate and sleeping bag superfluous. Great excitement hooking up our crampons but never had to use our ice-picks, that’s for next time. Walking on a glacier was never on my bucket list, but should, be, most amazing formations, colours and sounds, ice falling, water rushing through below, all round fun. 

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Posted by on September 8, 2014 in Uncategorized


On writing

I’m participating in a blog roll about….writing, although I feel like a fraud, a voyeur at this point as things are not really moving along. Apart from reading as much fiction as possible and thinking that I should be writing, or oh wow, that’s a good idea, I should write it down, there just seem to be 101 things to do. I know this is not an excuse, it’s about prioritizing and I have to get my priorities straight!

So here goes, I was sent this by Michelle, whose blog you can check out here:

The questions are:

1) What are you working on?
2) How does your work differ from others of its genre?
3) Why do you write what you do?
4) How does your writing process work?

1) I’m working on a middle grade novel which is a great adventure into deepest, darkest Africa, well not quite but Botswana comes close?

2) The setting makes this novel somewhat different, I love immersing myself in Africa while I can’t be there, so I’m creating some make-believe for myself, and hopefully for others. Also, I love children’s fiction. By children’s fiction I also mean young adult of course. The world would be a poorer place without The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, the Twilight series. What absolute complete fun! actually being there, so I can armchair travel to fill in the gaps. Speaking of which, Dina von Lowenkraft is also participating in this blogroll and has recently published Dragonfire. Also watch her space, some great new books will be coming along shortly.

3) I started writing this book because my son ran out of reading material that he liked and that he could cope with as a dyslexic. Now of course it’s taken me so long to write that he’s already slightly too old for it. No matter, I hope there will be others out there who will love it.

4) I try and set aside a specific amount of time each day and think I can wing it but actually have to work at building some structure into the story. i.e I’d like to be a pantser but I don’t think I have it in me.

Now my next step in this task is to contact four writers and ask them these questions, and create a huge network of people checking out blog posts.

Someone comes to mind, the author of my favourite blog, Susan Heyden and her blog I absolutely have to continue reading (most) posts especially because I find them really interesting (obvious) and also because I love the South Africanisms. I just miss being able to say, that was kiff, or stop gaaning aan, or whatever, just the right amount of flavour for me, so I’ll write to her straight away…..

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Posted by on May 14, 2014 in Uncategorized


air travel

Call it a luxury problem, tell me I’m spoilt, whatever, but I have to admit since 9/11, flying is not much fun. Security and passport checks abound, how many times could I change my identity in an airport, is it necessary to check us all about 10 different times? Yes, it’s for my safety I realise this but why the disparities in application? Some places oblige you to take you shoes off, others let you take a coke through, are there rules or not?

I figured out why an airport building is called a terminal, that’s how I felt after the pilot landed in Addis Ababa, it felt like he was doing a wheelie while jolting to the ground.
So, of course I needed the toilet, which was overcrowded and blocked by a traditionally built woman in a beautiful traditional dress. I negotiated my way past her to the sound a kid screaming and the sight of a woman washing her feet in the basin. People were doing stuff with plastic-looking teapots which might have had something to do with the fact that there was no toilet paper, or maybe not. I’m not sure I want to know. On my way out I got stuck behind the woman with the floral print dress, once again.

An interesting stopover all-round, I was exhausted and fed-up by the time I had to board the next plane, a long haul to Brussels. Not helped by people pushing and shoving and the rather nonchalant service on the oldest aeroplane I’ve been on, except maybe when I was 19. Either they wake you ap at 4 am for a paltry breakfast, or ignore you completely, I’m not sure what’s worse. It’s a good thing there was no screen in front of me as I managed to sleep.

I was contemplating a trip to Lalibela, but it would have to be overland from wherever I am at the given moment.


Posted by on April 21, 2014 in Uncategorized